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Tag: grief

Love Upon a Time

Posted in poetry, Relationships, and Uncategorized

Love cradled me long ago
 In a life once upon a time,
 I laid beside him;
 My ear,
 Tucked beneath his heart,
 Listening to staccato beat

Love broke one day
 In the blink of an eye
 I grasped him;
 Tight to my bosom
 Legs wrapped about him
 As he drove home our last goodbye

Love went away
 Seemingly to die
 I raised a marker;
 Where my heart once bled
 Now marble cold
 Without his warming light

Love sits in limbo
 A place beyond space and time
 It floats in stasis;
 Waiting
 For cryogenic frost
 To melt beneath renewed heat

Love stirs for you
 Even within layers of pain
 It yearns for release;
 My heart,
 Straining to meet and match
 Each beat for fervent beat


Pray Tell…..

Christina Nana Araba Asamoah

…….Why does death doll out
          Sorrow
            Pain
               Abject Misery?

Is it lunacy to want to shout;
         No!
           Remain!
             Stay with me!?

I would that he’d not knocked on our door
Touched your flesh with his icy digits
And snatched you from us

I’m afflicted with
Seeming streams of salty tears
Threatening to reduce me to a
Pathetic Puddle;
A pitiful mess.

You are gone way too soon
And I truly begin to wonder
Why death dolls out, such;
         Sorrow
           Pain
             Misery
Torment of never seeing you again.

~Daixy~


Some say we should have seen it coming.  After two strokes, why should we have expected her to survive?  But you see, those who say that didn’t see her the last time I did, before she left for her home.  She’d stepped out of our guest room dressed to the nines in a gorgeous kaba and slit.  It wasn’t really the outfit or her neatly pulled back hair that struck me that day though. It was the smirk she wore when she walked out the room and the confident stride she took up.  She looked ready to face the world…ready to fight.


I wish I’d taken a picture…

When life is just too hard to deal with: World Suicide Prevention Day

Today is World Suicide Prevention Day and it’s got me thinking a lot about things I can do to make the situation better in Ghana.  Depression, Suicide and abuse are not treated properly in this country but at least we have CHRAJ and WAJU.  Depression and suicide and mental health issues are ignored in Ghana and I believe that’s a huge boo boo.  I don’t know why it is that we are so afraid of death.  It’s a subject most do not want to discuss and even more so when someone takes his/her own life.  But I think burying our heads in the sand won’t make the problem go away.

Adults and children alike have been committing suicide in Ghana for several years.  Our poor record keeping though, means we don’t have actual figures.  Most info on suicide in Ghana comes from the sensationalist tabloids who aren’t given much credit for their newsworthiness.  We get stories like this one from time to time which shock us to the core momentarily and then we go about our daily business and forget all about the tragedy.

According to this article, over 1500 people, most of them between the ages of 20 and 35, were reported to have committed suicide in 2008.  I checked the Annual report of the Ghana Health Service and this wasn’t mentioned. I truly wonder if these reported cases come from the Ghana Police Service or the Health service.  Where are these figures from?!!!  The 2009 Annual report doesn’t mention Mental Health at all.  In 2007 however, according to their annual report,only 3.6% of the budget allocated to the Ghana Health Service went to the Mental health Services.   3.6%?  Healthy Mind Healthy Body!!!!  I know we have major diseases to deal with like TB and Malaria and Lymphatic Filariasis but seriously…..3.6% explains why we have so few mental health centres and why they are understaffed.  Shame on you GHS.  You should know better.

I have heard that KNUST has started a counseling centre to deal with these issues amongst its students. It’s a wonderful idea, what with the number of jumpers Tech has had over the years.  In searching for that, I discovered Lifeline Ghana.  I wonder if they’re fully operational and will be looking deeper into it.   They were kind enough to list their phone numbers so I will be giving them a call.


I’d love to see Legon do the same thing Tech is rumoured to be doing, and eventually spread it out all over the country. Anyone interested in seeing that happen should holla @ me.  I’m ready to get stuck in but will need all the help I can get.  More people on board will give us a bigger voice.

So um, Happy Suicide Prevention Day! 😀  Remember to hug your loved ones and tell them you care. And that loner of a coworker, maybe you should invite em out for a cup of coffee. I want to see us do this all day of the year.  This ain’t christmas to think about only on the D day 🙂

Anywho, don’t forget to check out :

WHO
IASP
WHO WSPD statement 2009

~Daixy~

When Life is too hard to deal with: To Write Love On Her Arms

To Write Love On Her ArmsImage by ninniane via Flickr
So, I was going to write one big piece for this week as suicide prevention day is coming up, but it just made me sad, depressed and frankly, I entered a dark place. I decided instead to provide links to info I think the world should read and give the little extra that I feel should be stressed on. Addiction, Depression, Self Harm and Suicide are topics that truly matter to me, right up there with abuse. I consider addiction, self harm and suicide to be abuse, not only of oneself, but of the people around you.   They do far more harm than we expect, scarring the lives of millions of people each year.
 
To Write Love on Her ArmsImage via Wikipedia
I want to introduce you guys to TWLOHA (To Write Love on Her Arms).  It’s a movement dedicated to the above.  TWLOHA has been raising awareness about addiction, depression, self harm and suicide since 2006.  They link people to hotlines and rehab centres close by and they offer real life stories from real life victims.  TWLOHA is all about showing people that they are not alone, that they are loved, and that life is so worth living right.  Feel free to visit their site and read their blog. The only problem I have with TWLOHA is that it’s transitioned from a movement into a fad.  Everyone is writing love, but not everyone knows why.  I think we should all know the reasons why we do what we do.  I missed TWLOHA day this year (was in febuary), I think the decision was made to randomise it so it’s not treated like christmas, where people think about it only at that time of the year.
For those of you out there who are feeling lost and all alone, who think constantly of suicide, who hurt yourselves:  remember, don’t pick up that razor, don’t slice up that wrist.  Instead, write “Love” on your arms. 
I write love on my arms.  Hopefully, you will too…..
~Daixy~

Yesterday…

 

Yesterday I slept
It was a fitful sleep
I tossed and turned
Whimpered and yearned
For the moment I would wake

Because,

Yesterday I dreamed
I dreamed of you
I dreamed of me
We had made plans
Wanted a family

Yesterday you died
I am kneeling upon the freshly packed earth
Staring at the spot that will soon bear your marker
A tear makes its trail from the corner of my eye,
Down my nose and now, hangs precariously off the tip
It drops to the ground and…
Finally it hits me

YOU’RE down there
There’s no air
You can’t breathe!!!

My fingers scrabble at the earth
Frantically
Hot liquid streams down my face as I call to you
My nails break but I feel nothing
I ignore the blood from the pads of my fingers
I must get to you!

My heart is hammering,
Loud in my ears
And now the soil is moist with my tears
Hands grab onto mine in an attempt to still them

A voice
Insistent in my ear
And yet I do not understand
They’re wrong
You’re not gone
You can’t be gone

The hands move up to my forearms,
Lifting me up
Pulling me away
“No!! He’s down there!!!”
My screams mingle with my words
My breath is laboured
My chest bursting with fear
(Fear of a life without you)
“He can’t breathe! Let him out!”

I feel myself being pulled down to the ground
(A life without your touch)
Arms wrap around me as I plead
(A life without your smell)
“You can’t leave him down there,”
(A life without your voice)
“He’s gonna die!!!”

The hands hold me tighter
The lack of response
The utter silence
The look in my companion’s eyes as I search them pleadingly…

My struggles cease
As,I finally realise
Yesterday you died…
And I died with you.
~Daixy~
I found this when looking through my old stuff.  All I can say is WTF?!!  It’s so dark, so painful and yet I’m so proud of it.  It still feels unfinished even after tweaking it so many times.  Ah well, no work is ever truly complete methinks. Always room for improvement