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Daixy's Blogg Posts

Otiko Djaba, Rape is not an STD.

Posted in Uncategorized

Dear Otiko Djaba,

Rape is NOT an STD. We Cannot Prevent Rape by Covering our bodies!

It is not often that I take the time to write to persons in positions of authority, as for the most part, I believe that authorities know what they are doing and do not need my input. However, on the odd occasion, I have been known to speak up. Ms Zita Okaikoi heard from me regarding her inaction, during her tenure as Ambassador to the Czech Republic, when a Ghanaian male was treated like “garbage” in that country.

Your predecessor, the Honourable Oye Lithur also heard from me, though I did not share my strong words for her here but kept to facebook, when she chose to sign the petition for the release of the Montie 3. Today, my attention is on you, and only you.

When you spoke up for yourself during your vetting and stood your ground when compelled to apologise to former President Mahama, I applauded from my home. I posted on social media about how it was high time we had a headstrong woman in the role of gender minister, who would not kowtow to the whimsy of our patriarchal society.

Imagine my joy when you turned up for your swearing-in looking radiant in your traditional garb and with your “interesting hairstyle” and hit back at your detractors when they accused you of setting a poor example for girls. Your defense for your hairstyle warmed my heart. Surely you would defend human rights as you defended your hair, no? Soon after, however, the bombs began to drop.

When videos began to circulate, in which a suspected female thief was sexually abused by a group of traders, you took days to speak regarding the issue, and even then, only to say that the police must be allowed to follow due process, and that the lady in question did not want to be found. My jaw dropped. With actual evidence in hand, the State wanted the victim to press charges before locking up those men? Even if she was proven to be a thief, did she deserve to be treated in such a manner?

The whole thing reminded me of an incident in Legon Uni where another alleged thief was stripped naked and manhandled by the males in one of the Mensah Sarbah Hall Annexes. Video footage circulated from this incident as well and some rather vile minded persons implied that she got what she deserved. I wonder why it took so long for action to be taken in the February 2017 event, when there was video evidence clearly showing the faces of her attackers.

You disappointed me, Otiko. You disappointed me so much but I had hope. I, and other women I hold dear to my heart, hoped you would “show us levels” but alas, just as Maya Angelou said, when someone shows you their character, believe them the first time.

I have actually left my sick bed to write to you tonight. I am supposed to be on bed rest while my back heals up but noooo, I needed to sit upright and take the time to let you know how disappointed I am, that you, a Minister for Gender should stand before a group of adolescent girls and declare that they should avoid wearing short skirts in order to prevent rape.

Can we stop devaluing men and their ability to think? Their brains are not actually stored in their penises.

I must thank you for warning male teachers not to coerce and abuse their charges. Warning them to desist from impregnating the girls, was a step in the right direction considering the society we live in but sadly, even this one good deed of yours stood on rocky ground. It gives the impression that the only thing wrong with male teachers sleeping with students, is the possibility of pregnancy.

You were absolutely right, in that it is an abuse of their rights but I put to you that pregnancy should be the least of their worries, but rather the emotional and physical trauma they inflict on their victims. Focusing on the risk of pregnancy ignores the fact that STDs could be transmitted and that female teachers could also be taking advantage of their charges, be they male or female students.

You mentioned something else that caught my attention, “We want to initiate a mentoring program; a girls-girls leadership program in all the schools, from basic to tertiary and as well as within the communities to ensure that we know our rights and we understand what it is to be  a woman who is an equal partner in society, no longer women behind but side by side with our men as equal partners”.

Great initiative but I wonder, can we have a mentoring program for boys as well? One which teaches them that older women sleeping with them is a form of abuse and not something they should be “proud of”? One that teaches them that they do not deserve sex whenever and wherever they want it, and that they should not be afraid to speak up when they are being forced into situations they are uncomfortable with? Our society has taught men for far too long, that their “manhood” and brains lay in their penises, and that women exist solely to provide them with pleasure.

In the next breath, you are alleged to have stated, that the girls should “…be bold, be confident, be respectful. If you wear a short dress, it’s fashionable but know that it can attract somebody who would want to rape or defile you. You must be responsible for the choices you make”.

Here is where I screamed in fury before being reduced to a weeping mess. My dear woman, that was a terrible gaffe. You revealed in those words, the fact that you are as much embroiled in the patriarchal BS that we are fed daily, as women. As the defender of human rights, you managed, in one fell swoop, to lay the blame for rape at the feet of the victims (fine, fine, potential victims). Please be informed, if you have not read my header above, “Rape is not an STD and we cannot prevent it by covering up“.

Rape Condom! To deter lusty males from infecting your body with rape.

Your statement ignores the following:

  1. Rape is not about sex. People do not rape because they are horny and want to get off. No, rape is about control, about power, about abusing a vulnerability, be it mental or physical. It is this “power thirst” that has warriors raping while they pillage villages. You think they simply miss their wives? No no it is about humiliation of the enemy and proving their weakness. “Haha you call yourselves warriors? Watch us violate your women and children”. Sex has been used as a weapon for years and so I am appalled when I meet people who miss the purpose of rape.
  2. Rape involves more than a penis and a vagina. I do not believe in the Ghanaian legal definition for rape, as it assumes just as you have, that rape only involves a man placing his penis inside of a woman’s vagina. The term defilement annoys me also, as it implies a sullying of the victim. The victim is not dirty, in the case of “defilement” so why use such a disgusting term? Newsflash, Madam Minister, men can be raped too. They can be raped by men, and by women. Once upon a time, I thought it was impossible to rape a man but then I learned that rape is about consent, and consent can be denied, even in the presence of a physical response.Research has shown that in fight or flight situations, men can have erections. The same happens with women, who often are ashamed to report rape because their bodies responded during the struggle. Most often, their attackers even point out to them the fact that their bodies are prepped and ready.I ask you, as a woman who seems to think that short skirts are the reason for rape, what would you say to a woman who told you she said no to a man but he forced himself on her and that, to her shame, she had an orgasm or two? Would you as gender Minister then decide her orgasm was proof of consent? I think you need some gender sensitivity training.
  3. Rapists have self control. Yes they do! They have so much self control in fact, that they actively search for persons they can overpower physically and mentally. A rapist who is 5’4″ and weighs 50kg will not attempt to physically overpower a person who is 6’2″ and weighs 90kg, certainly not without a weapon, or with prior knowledge that the potential victim is not mentally sound and thus can be coerced into the act.All those house helps seducing their young charges, call it statutory rape or no, there is a clear indication that these persons have had their bodies and rights violated.The idea that showing a little bare skin is enough to drive men into a sexual frenzy is absurd and should not be perpetrated any further. If a woman should choose to walk through the streets naked, it is not an excuse for anyone, male or female to touch them inappropriately, let alone insert objects into any orifices.  You liken men to animals with no self control, when we have seen dogs back off from food because they were told “NO”. Are men honestly reduced below the level of dogs when they get turned on?
  4. Rapists do not always beat their victims into submission. Most children who are assaulted will tell you their attackers did not beat them. They may have threatened violence either on their person or that of a loved one in order to get them to keep quiet, but overall, child molesters (rapists) simply prey on innocence and naivete to get what they want. Drugging an adult victim is a sure way of overpowering them without physical force. Or perhaps you, like the Ghana Police, want every victim to turn up with rope burns, swollen eyes, busted lips and vaginal tears to prove they did not consent to sex?
  5. Women in full clothing get raped too. The high incidence of rape in countries like India and Bangladesh are proof enough that no matter what a person wears, they can still be attacked by predators. Long skirt, short skirt, tights or jeans trousers, none will prevent a narcissist from taking what they want.

Pardon me for the long rant but I feel very passionately about this because this argument allows a lot of rapists to get away scott free. It allows boyfriends, dates, husbands (yes and girlfriends and wives) to simply refuse to take no for an answer, force a physical response from their victim and take from them, that which they do not wish to give.

Patriarchy has done this to us. Women are taught they are to blame if they are raped, that they are at fault if they get pregnant and men are taught that they are men when they have a high body count. They refuse to consider that they could be sexually assaulted because they cannot fathom ever having a woman or another man managing to overpower them physically or mentally.

Let’s please get this right and stop victim shaming. Giving predators excuses will never do, and teaching our young women that their clothing will drive men into a frenzy is beyond irresponsible.

Ms Djaba, i must ask you to do better. As gender minister, you are more than just a voice for the voiceless. You should never be caught perpetrating such misogyny.  Please don’t ever tell girls they make a choice to be preyed on by rapists when they dress a certain way. I don’t see us telling the lion that the gazelle was prancing about like a slut and deserved to be eaten.
And thus a closet rapist is born

The next time you talk about sexual abuse in any form, please remember to discuss consent. Let it be known that a man or woman has no right to demand oral, vaginal or anal sex from another person. Let them know even hand jobs are not to be demanded.

I and other Ghanaians want to hear you telling men and women that even if a person consented to sex, and is in the middle of the act, they still have a choice to say no and walk away. Let it also be known that if a man or woman says no to sex, that it is not alright to convince them to say yes, by stroking their bodies into submission.

This is one thing I have noticed in some Ghanaian relationships, where people assume the person saying no is playing hard to get. Disrespecting the person’s wants and choices, forcing a physical response from them, and carrying on is reprehensible. Sex is supposed to be between two willing individuals. The fact that one person has to be coerced should surely kill any vim, no? 

Oh by the way, I went out drinking on Friday night wearing a short dress and heels. The older male I was with, despite my near intoxication, thin frame and sexy clothing (the dress even had cut outs to show some flesh above my boobs) did not rape me. He had several chances, as we were in a dark and quiet section of the bar we visited and the streets on our drive back to my home were dark, to overpower and rape me, but he did not. In fact, he did not even touch my arm or leg, simply because I had already told him prior, that I was not interested in sex with him, or anyone, and that I was only interested in making a new friend. I know this must be a shock to you, and to others who hold your views that men are uncontrollable beings led by their penises but this man is a prime example of what we nurture when we, as a society teach men and women to respect each other, and make them understand that they are not entitled to anything from another person.

Oh by the by, I apologise for calling your hairstyle a chicken style on twitter. I was overcome by anger yet still, I owe you an apology. Your hairstyle should have no impact on your duty, unless the weave is sewn in too tight and making it impossible for you to concentrate.

Be the woman we expect you to be, Otiko. Show us that you’re here to protect all genders and that you are capable of doing your job.

Sincerely Yours,

~Daixy~

PS I have so much more to say but I am emotionally and physically exhausted. Should you wish to debate further, my twitter handle is @D41XY. I loooove to debate online, but only when I do not have deadlines to meet.

 

A Language of Stars

Posted in poetry, and Relationships

Img Source: Zias

 

I love you
Like the moon does the sun,
Bathing in its warm rays to reflect
Light, heat, gravitational energy;
Pulling a sea of emotions to and fro

I love you
Even as a dream
Of sandcastles and wave-hewn rocks
And seaweed monsters defeated by salt-foam dragons

I miss you
Like the sky does the sun at night
These stars?
They are but pale imitations
Of your cosmic heat

I need you
But you are too far gone,
Your love-light turned moon
Basking in the rays of another sun.

~Daixy~

Love Upon a Time

Posted in poetry, Relationships, and Uncategorized

Love cradled me long ago
 In a life once upon a time,
 I laid beside him;
 My ear,
 Tucked beneath his heart,
 Listening to staccato beat

Love broke one day
 In the blink of an eye
 I grasped him;
 Tight to my bosom
 Legs wrapped about him
 As he drove home our last goodbye

Love went away
 Seemingly to die
 I raised a marker;
 Where my heart once bled
 Now marble cold
 Without his warming light

Love sits in limbo
 A place beyond space and time
 It floats in stasis;
 Waiting
 For cryogenic frost
 To melt beneath renewed heat

Love stirs for you
 Even within layers of pain
 It yearns for release;
 My heart,
 Straining to meet and match
 Each beat for fervent beat


Tag Teaming at the Vittles Souk

Posted in health, and Uncategorized

EnoYaa Mapa Farms
EnoYaa Mapa Farms

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Okay Okay, so my Title is a bit misleading.

There will be no wrestling at this event but there will be lots of food and family fun!

Am I shamelessly plugging an event I am helping organise and will be selling my products at? Yes!

Am I inviting you to come support two days of family fun and encouraging you to support not just my business but tons of other local entrepreneurs? Yes!

5&6 November at the African Regent Gardens for the Vittles Souk, my organic business, Orghanix and EnoYaa Mapa Farms will bring you fresh organic vegetables and homemade oils and butters.

It’s all 100% pesticide and chemical fertilizer free, grown with love by two passionate women determined to help you live the best life you can.

What will we have on sale? Oh I’m so glad you asked.

Organic carrots
Organic carrots
organic lettuce mix
organic lettuce mix
iceberg lettuce
iceberg lettuce
peppermint
peppermint
Mother of herb
Mother of herb
collard greens
collard greens
Orghanix homemade whipped body butter
Orghanix homemade whipped body butter
Orghanix massage and bath oil
Orghanix massage and bath oil

Just FYI, there will be a cooking competition on Sunday November 6. Bring your partners and step up to a jollof or Palava sauce challenge.

So will I see you there? Of course I will. Make sure to grab a selfie with us.

As always,

~Daixy~

Ebb n Flow

Posted in poetry

My Love,

At times you are timid;

Testing my temperature as the ocean water tickles the shore

Others, you are more sure of yourself;

Ebbing and flowing about me,

Stroking emotions I have hidden far too long.

Yet others you come crashing in;

Tempestuous, unbridled, fierce

Then retreat,

Ripping a piece of me with you

Leaving me longing,

And when I least expect it;

Come crashing home once more,

Into my arms, a penitent sinner,

Relentless in your pleas for mercy.

Ever the fool, I take you back

For what is a beach without her ocean love?

Still,

Beware, My Love,

That you do not retreat too often,

That you control your storm-driven heart,

For there is only so much of me

And soon,

There will be nothing left for you to return to.

Flight Song

Posted in poetry

Image Source

Come along with me
On a discovery
Of a world between dream and reality
Float away with me
Make no apologies
For the song within you.

Sing of a memory
Set your soul free
To roam the earth as it
Was meant to

Sing of the love
That you won and lost
The joys; and pain you’ve paid as cost
Sing of your hopes
To find another heart
That beats a matching tune to yours.

Soar on up with me
Just a bit higher,
Let go of your hold on gravity
Behind you are the tears of the past
Ahead, endless possibilities

Let your voice ring out
Here no one can stop your ascent
You can let go of the yearning
From deep in your soul.
See? the clouds of hurt,
Are parting before you

No no, don’t hide from the light
Reach out for it.
Can’t you hear it calling to you?
You are no Icarus
You will not burn
Go on, touch the sun

Ooh, can you feel the love?
Let it pulsate about you
Breathe it all in
Now sing,
Sing your heart out
Allow this journey to heal you

There! You hear it?
That perfect harmony?
Feel those arms embracing you,
Those lips caressing yours?
No no, don’t run. Stay right there.
You are right where you are meant to be

What’s that?
No, no you don’t need to know the way back.
You’re a balloon, you have no need for the past
And look, you have someone to rise with.
There you go! Accept this reality
The other is now but a fading dream.

 

Watch Out! He’s got a…camera?

Posted in Sights

Bet you thought I was gonna say gun :p

Meet PK Opoku.

The hero that Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs. #dark #selfportrait #film #shadow

A photo posted by P.K. Opoku (@pkopoku) on

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He’s trained with Hidan and joined the brotherhood of Jashin.

He’s worth 4.50 pesewas in select Shell Shops across the country but to me and everyone that knows him, he is priceless.

PK is a not so recent graduate of the University of Science and Technology. By day, he’s a software specialist. By night, he is Batman or the Joker, depending on his mood but on holidays and weekends, well on weekends he’s transformed into Peter Parker.

Yes, PK is Ghana’s own Spiderman. Wait….he’s not? He hasn’t been bitten by the radioactive spider yet? Oh boo.

Good luck with that PK. Ganbatte!

If you’ve seen any cute pictures of me circulating online, chances are they were taken by PK.

af766cab-50b0-4e66-a1ce-9247b075ad53
Enter the Frohawk

 

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Here’s me charging my forehead torch 😉

Take a look at bit of his work below and when you have time, kindly pay a visit to his instagram page for more.

 

Where’s Wally? #bw #blackandwhite #aburi #street #houses #aburi

A photo posted by P.K. Opoku (@pkopoku) on

Shelob #spider #wildlife

A photo posted by P.K. Opoku (@pkopoku) on

 

Edge. #sekondi #takoradi #shore #rocks #sea #water #cliff #ghana

A photo posted by P.K. Opoku (@pkopoku) on

 

By all means, please book him for your event shoots. We need to fuel his addiction for ribs smothered in Jack Daniels Sauce 😉

If you want to avoid the website, he can be reached at hello@photobyoh.com

 

Tell him Mz Daixy sent you 😉

 

Skypiea! Just kidding. This Is GHANA!!!!

Posted in Sights

“It’s been so long and I’m lost without You”….

Y’all don’t know how much I’ve missed you. I have no excuses for not updating this blog. Twitter stole my soul 🙁
Well Twitter and fact that I am attempting to start a business. More on that later.

But I’m back and I’m going to try to update at least every two weeks, whether it is with a poem, photo or just an update on my escapades.

Today, I just wanted to share with you all, my view from one of my drives into the Aburi Hills. It had rained the day before, and these were taken at about 7am the next day. Sun was bright and the clouds came out to greet us. I was so awed by the gorgeousness, I had to grab my phone and snap some photos.

I’m not much of a photog, and these were edited on the phone also so pardon me if they don’t meet standard but you have to come see this for yourself. This is the stretch of road from Aburi to Nsawam and runs right along the border between Greater Accra and the Eastern Region.

Fans of “One Piece” will understand the Skypiea reference. Now all I gotta ask is, “Do you know the way to Sharpshooter Island?”.

Skypiea?
Skypiea?

 

What I would give to hike to that hilltop and bathe in the clouds
What I would give to hike to that hilltop and bathe in that sea of clouds

 

Dreams are made from these clouds
Dreams are made from these clouds

Of Black People and Depression

Posted in health

This week’s Being Mary Jane raised a very important topic. It’s one they have brought up before in Season 1, when Mary Jane’s friend, played by Ludacris, commits suicide after he’s outed for forging sections of his award winning book.

Fine Black Brother knocking himself off?
Fine Black Brother knocking himself off?

Forward to Season 2 when a major character chooses to end it rather than deal with shame, confusion, and regret.

I won’t spoil the episode for you, and won’t waste the time blasting the writers of the show for choosing such an easy way to grab attention for the show instead of working on redeeming said character but I will say that during the Ep, Mary Jane and her friends discuss how their whole lives they’ve been told that black people do not get depressed, that we as a race are strong, fighters and stand through whatever woes befall us. According to them, People of African descent do not ever commit suicide.

Scracth record
Image source: Google

Umm…say what?!

While they are right in that that is the accusation leveled at us, I posit that it is false. The black man is no different from the Caucasian, Hispanic, Asian… We all stem from the same mother/father of life and share characteristics.

It surprises me that the writers of the show, and thus  the characters, for all their reading do not know of pre-colonial African tribeswomen who locked themselves in barns and set themselves on fire when they learned their men had lost the battle and enemy raiders were on their way to rape and pillage? Did they not read about these women who chose suicide rather than permit their bodies to be ravaged? I’m attempting to locate my notes from Uni, where I discovered this info but I do recall that Dr Esi Sutherland Addy mentioned this in a class I took at the African Studies Department also.

And for goodness sakes have they not read Things Fall Apart, and how Okwonkwo hanged himself rather than face his shame?

Yes I know my examples are few but for an Africa whose History is barely written/known, we cannot presume that these things did not happen in the past, or that it’s impossible in our present for us to be riddled with pain, so much so that we cannot bear to live on this earth.

Read on the deaths of Don Cornelius of Soul Train Fame, as well as of Leanita McClain.

And damn, y’all, Sam Sarpong jumped to his death following 7 hours of chit chat with local law enforcement and family.

We can’t continue to hide under a rock and say black people are strong and don’t get depressed, or don’t ever commit suicide. We as a people deal with so much and I really feel our religion helps a lot in keeping us in check. We force ourselves out of depression most times, especially when we have support around us but honestly (and from personal experience) it’s not always easy to hide from it all. Anxiety and depression, be they as a result from PTSD, or the lows of bipolar disorder, or general anxiety disorder, etc are very real. They are not just episodes of people being sad. They are not emotions to simply be shelved away and ignored. They are very real, very disturbing thought patterns that cannot seem to go away.

A discussion I had with someone a few weeks ago had him, a medic, telling me that some people just want attention and just want to be miserable. But think about it, if all a person has ever known is misery, if all they have known is negativity and self loathing, how do you think they will be able to appreciate happiness? They are comfortable in it, it is what they know. Attention seeking behaviour is also a mental issue by the way.

Here’s a video I found on Buzzfeed which should give you a hint of what people deal with.

Rather than belittling Mental Illness and making people who suffer, yes I said suffer, from depression, why don’t we acknowledge that it exists and work towards helping each other stand when the weight of the world is simply too much for a single shoulder to bear? The world is already doing everything to destroy black lives, and we are already doing well by killing each other off…should we really be allowing suicide to cull our numbers further?

 

Everyone’s pain is relative. Don’t think your situation is worse than someone else’s. If someone is sharing their issues, don’t belittle them as attention seeking behavior and walk away. Different people have different thresholds of pain and you never know how close someone may be to harming themself because they can’t see the way out. Help them see a way out. Share their pain and give them a bit of your joy. This advice is for both people suffering from depression and those who have to listen to them. How many times have I heard a depressed person tell me I am lucky because I don’t have any problems? I tell them things are not always as they seem and just because I put a bright face forward does not mean I do not have my own issues with anxiety.

For people suffering from depression, I beg you to find help. I know paranoia is waaaaay high during episodes and you question everyone’s motives but put that aside. Get the help you need, unless it’s from the devil. If someone is willing to help, let them. Just do whatever it takes to stay alive because trust me, the world is not going to be magically better without you in it and the pain and loss your friends and family will suffer if you should succumb to depression and suicide will be unimaginable. Don’t make them suffer as you are. This is not a situation in which misery should love company.

Be strong, for yourself first and surround yourself with strong people who will hold you up when you are weak.

And remember, God loves you and has a purpose for you. Your purpose is not to live a miserable life and die without impacting a single soul. Your purpose, no matter how trivial your life may seem, is to live, pray, love. You will be amazed to discover what you think of in yourself as useless is exactly what someone else needs to keep carrying on.

Peace prevail in your hearts and homes.

~Daixy~

 

PS this debate on #blacklivesmatter still has me pissed. All lives matter. Black people are not the only race in history to be enslaved, abused and murdered in droves. How about we change the story from Black man assaulted to man assaulted? How about we treat people as humans, instead of constantly trying to isolate race and religion? By focusing on their being human (and I’m not saying ignore their race completely), but by focusing on their humanity and insisting on their rights as humans, I believe we will go way further in eliminating abuse. While we are yobbing about black lives matter, Hispanics are also rotting in jail. Asians are also facing discrimination and our Arab brothers and sisters are paying the penalty for a select few terrorists who choose to tag religion onto their exploits.

#AllLivesMatter

Relationship Peeves…What ticks you off?

Posted in Relationships

A while ago I got to thinking about common relationship peeves; some of which I have dealt with in the past, and on request by a certain Kofi Laing I put them down on paper. This applies, I think, not just to your life partners but to room/housemates, siblings etc.

Here’s my list so far for whatever unlucky bugger ends up sharing a house with my OCD personality type behind.

  1. Leaving the toilet seat up!. Men just don’t get why women hate this. Until you have fallen into a toilet, you just won’t get it. It’s happened to me on a dumsor night and it wasn’t pretty. Please don’t do this to your women.
    This peeve goes a bit further though when the other half leaves the toilet lid up. Please keep the lid down, especially when flushing to loo.

    Do you have any idea how far the bacteria splash from an open toilet bowl goes? Toothbrushes, face and handtowels….eugh!

    index
    Please keep me covered
  2. Dripping pee on the floor. Us women thought the whole idea of you lifting the seat was so you wouldn’t get pee everywhere.
  3. Not wiping properly when you do a number 2. Streaky boxers and briefs are sooo not what I signed up for here. Otherwise, you’re going to do your own laundry.
  4. Toothpaste Wars!
    index
    Why you do this? 😮

    Why can’t you squeeze from the bottom? And when you brush your teeth, must you really spray the mirror? Maybe we should have separate bathrooms.

    toothpaste-tube
    Yes, I actually fold up my toothpaste from the bottom. I don’t use a clip though but this is a cool idea
  5. Hairs on soap. Don’t even want to think about where the hairs are from but umm…maybe you could stick to the showergel and leave my herbal soap bars alone?
  6. Why can’t you pick up after yourself?  Even worse when it’s clothes. Wet ones. Like towels. And right after I’ve cleaned!
  7. Singing an annoying song… just to get it stuck in my head. I see you “Lamb Chops Play Along”.https://youtube.com/watch?v=xz6OGVCdov8frameborder%3D0allowfullscreen
  8. Clipping your nails in the bedroom…not cleaning em up after. Please do this in the bathroom on newspaper. And trash em.
  9. Failing to replace toilet paper in the bathroom. And when you do, placing it backwards. Please don’t do this…
    The_Wrong_Way_to_Display_Toilet_Paper
    Photo Credit : manwifeanddog.com

    I’ll love you always if you do this:

    images
    I like facing this way.
  10. Chewing food loudly or talking with your mouth full. Basically just eating like a Neanderthal. That’s a deal breaker. I’d be out of that relationship so fast, or my poor housemate would be looking for new lodgings.
  11. Blanket nabbing. Please don’t hog the blanket, oh future husband. I get so cold and would even prefer we snuggle for warmth. I’m going to apologise in advance though because I have cold feet and will no doubt be putting them on your legs or back.
  12. Alarm wars. Soooo this one is really something you will hate about me, oh future husband. I’m a snoozer. My alarm is really for 6:30am but I set it for 5:00 am. And another at 5:30 and then at 6:00. I will hit snooze for every single one of them except for 6:30. I apologise in advance because it is bound to annoy you. But hey, I have a solution. Roll over and turn that first alarm off and come say “good morning”. 🙂 And don’t worry about being late for work. There’s three more alarms to make sure we’re out of bed in time for work.

So what are your pet peeves? Are they issues you can work around? Maybe even ignore? Or are some of them deal breakers that mean war and tears? Please share in the comments below.